Chapter 5

WARNING: Ever had a sad fap?

So what you trying to do to me?
It’s like we can’t stop, we’re enemies
But we get along when I’m inside you,
You’re like a drug that’s killing me
I cut you out entirely
But I get so high when I’m inside you
-Animals

I was sleeping in Salve’s thighs as he played with my hair, but my eyes flew open because of the sounds through that door. “Urrrghhh…” I grabbed the pillow and clamp it against one side of my head.

“Do they really have to f*ck in Redd’s room?!” I complain, my own stomach grumbling from the temptation of blood. “God, I can hear and smell them from here… ahhh, it’s unbearable!”

“Shouldn’t you be satisfied after Leo’s blood?” He asked quietly, but on edge.

I sat up, restless. “He said I’m a newborn. Which means my thirst is demanding and I just want nothing but to drink—f*ck, how am I gonna live like this for the rest of my life!”

Salve looked away, jaw tightened. He sounded neutral—not accusing, but not hiding his disdain either. “You seemed to have enjoyed Leo so much.”

“Sal, I didn’t mean it!” I snap, pacing around the room. “It was like something else took over, it’s like I felt desire for him when I sucked out his blood. Not love, no. I could never love anyone but you but—ahh!”

I grab my head, trying to lock out the deep feeling of passion I felt for Leo earlier. “When I sucked his blood, I felt what they did when I walked into this place. Their desire, their temptation, I could feel it like I was put in their place—”

“You wanted to f*ck him,” Salve crossed his arms bitterly.

“Salve… you think I wanted him?”

“I could feel it!” He suddenly screams at me, pained by what he saw earlier that I couldn’t fault him for. “But I know the thirst made it hard for you to resist, but it still hurt knowing what you wanted at that moment! I hate that, I hate that you have to do this, I hate what you’ve become! You’ll become a f*ck pillow for the rest of the vampires here and I CAN’T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!”

“Salve… I don’t want this. I don’t want them, I—” My thirst runs through my veins and into my empty stomach until I knelt on the floor in hopelessness, but soon looked up to see the Lady of Carnation Valley extending her hands toward me. But I felt no love from this God, I felt no hope from Her. This God represents Her claim over me as one of Her children.

However, I felt Salve’s presence behind me. No warmth, but I feel him hug me. He whispers to me, “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you from dying, I’m sorry I couldn’t save you now. I can’t stop the hunger. But I can stay with you while it passes. You don’t have to face it alone.”

He pleads, like a prayer, “Just promise me you won’t lose yourself too much. Promise me you won’t lose yourself to them.”

I held his arms as it embraced me, but my hand only ended up against my chest. “It hurts. I love you so much, Salve. It hurts that you aren’t here.”

An hour later, they were still going at it. I need to get out of this room. Evie’s voice is too loud and I can smell the sharp blood they’re sucking other than their d*cks. I removed myself from the bedroom and went out to the garden in the dead of night, hopeful to see Lucien but he wouldn’t be out this late. I just need air, even if it’s from the silent night with a bright full moon.

I inhaled the cold air—which was a bad idea because I can smell sweet smelling blood from inside the school. I immediately shut off my nose, but it was still there. I started walking away from the school, hoping it’ll fade.

I didn’t realize I ended up in the lake until a soft airy voice met my ears. “Steam can block it out.”

My eyes met Glass’s half-lidded, drowsy gaze as he tilted his head at me, arms folded atop the stone embankment of the ornamental lake, the surface steaming with fog. He lingered beneath a willow tree whose long, silken branches trailed into the water, their shadows trembling across the surface where lilies drifted, the air dreamlike just like his two-toned eyes. One a rich brown, one a dull grey.

“You’re here to get away from the smell, right?” He says softly like his voice is the embodiment of a whisper, “I made the lake warm. Its steam could block out the smell.”

I warily walk towards the lake, finding the smell of blood fading the more I get closer. I look down at Glass, finding him nude under the lake. “You can… make the lake warm?”

“I can increase my body temperature; make a room hot, the water warmer. It’s a gift from God; we are given a fraction of the power angels have,” he said sweetly. “Come, join me.”

This is a bad idea. I can feel my hunger knowing through my stomach, but it isn’t that bad. Maybe the steam can help suppress it, so I removed my shoes and dipped my feet into the lake, sitting on the edge of it. “Why didn’t you join them, Glass?”

“I did, I just had enough. Redd wanted more, so Evie is currently taking care of him. How was Leo? He can be a very passionate partner.”

I awkwardly squirm in my seat. Should I tell him we didn’t sleep together? “He’s gentle. He made sure not to force me.”

“Hmm. Leo is never gentle… not to us. He f*cks, he feeds, he leaves. He’s Evie’s least favorite… but I like him like that.” I find myself squinting my eyes to what he said. The f*ck he means he likes Leo that way?

“You look tired and worn, Jude. Here, let me warm you up…” Glass swam closer to me, specifically my feet where I pulled out of the water, but he held my ankle gently and cupped water in his other hand to… wash me. Pressed his hand against my feet and washed it with lake water, peering at me with eyes that look like they belong to two different people. What is he doing…

“B-but we don’t feel warm…” I said in response to his offer.

“No. But the fact I’m serving you… being here for you, brings warmth to the cold heart—not the skin.” He starts massaging my feet with both hands, slowly tugging it back into the water where I can feel the sensations of liquid that’s supposed to be warm, but is only cold. Glass giggles at the evident pleasure in my face.

“Relax… rest,” he says like a siren lulling me to sleep. But no, I stayed awake, since it’s hard to focus when the hunger is currently crawling up my guts.

I distracted myself by looking at him and his perfectly sleepy eyes. His cool-toned dark skin, sparkling against the light of the moon. His eyes, mystical and unreal. His lips are luscious and thick, which suddenly presses themselves on the bridge of my feet—

“What are you doing?” I pull it out of his hold, and he giggles like he just caught me in a joke.

“You were distracted, Jude. I figured I’d snap you out of your trance,” he giggles, swimming back into the lake with a big bright smile that closes up his eyes fully. “Why don’t you join me? Don’t worry, I’ve already eaten. I won’t prey on you.”

At the end of his words is an innocent giggle for intentions that I’m not sure are pure. He looks like a mermaid; twists of hair sitting heavy on his head, looking like he’s been swimming in the ocean for hundreds of years, luring sailors into the depths with his captivating two-toned eyes. That’s how beautiful he is. He looks like—

“I do not look like him!” Salve angrily yells out from behind me, “We should go back inside.”

No… I can’t. The school is full of temptation. I decided to unbutton my shirt and remove it, but hesitated on removing my pants. So I just entered the water, never mind my bottoms getting wet. I need to distract myself from my hunger, Salve. Going inside where I can smell the others feeding would be a terrible idea.

“Mmm, shy?” Glass tilts his head at me and my submerged pants. I just sank to what seemed to be chest-level of water, staying on the edge as Glass floated near the center. “Don’t worry, you’ll find the steam very relaxing. Although you can’t feel its warmth; it’s supposed to be very hot.”

“Why do you have that kind of power?” I ask him. Indeed, the water feels cold. But the lake is steaming.

“I believe my warmth is supposed to lure humans into a false sense of security…. they will shed their clothes easily in a hot room, and they’ll surrender to the warmth that I offer. It’s too bad vampires can’t feel it,” Glass says, swimming towards the edge, towards me. “But I can make my blood feel warm as it goes down your throat… a hot meal that will satisfy your craving. When you sink your teeth inside, I will warm myself up like a fresh meal. Would you like to try?”

He extends his neck by pushing his head to the side, my breath getting deeper at the sight of his blood pulsing through his veins. The steam made the smell faint, but it was still there… luring me into the depth of the waters.

“Jude,” an echo of Salve’s voice in the distance seems unrecognizable. “Jude, snap out of it!“

“Would you like to taste?” Glass’ hands crawl to my neck, as soft as his voice wrapping around my head. I focused on my breathing, too occupied on locking out the sweet nectar of his blood that I didn’t notice him pressing his lips against my neck, traveling up to the most sensitive spot: my pulse.

The lake is cold while Glass offers his hot blood inside his veins. I desperately sought after that warmth—I didn’t notice my lips seeking for his own, until I felt what seemed like Salve’s lips on mine. But they weren’t; it was Glass.

“SNAP OUT OF IT!”

I can hear him clearly now, and I pulled away from the kiss before pushing myself at a distance, splashing my face with water to knock myself out of that desire. “F*ck… I… I wasn’t supposed to do that… don’t tempt me like that!”

“You’re so cute, puppy.” Glass tilts his head, giggling. Then he removes himself from the water and walks along the edge, onto a bag where he took out what seemed to be a pill bottle. “I only waited for you to act first. I don’t have powers to hypnotize or to control. You’re just very hungry.”

“And you’re taking advantage of that…” I glare at him, but watched as he poured a couple of pills into his palm and threw it up his mouth. Wait… I remember those. On the first night, he took the same while sleeping with Redd and Pryce. Is it medicine?

“The kiss was nice. I just wanted to take care of our newborn.” Proudly naked, Glass sat on the edge while I tried my best not to stare. “I’m avoiding Leo’s wrath so I won’t do anything impulsive, but if you want to feed on me, I’ll willingly give myself to you…”

“Th-thanks?” He seems less scary than Evie. “I don’t want anyone to feed on me.”

“Ohh, you’re missing out!” he threw his head back, sighing into the mist. “It’s better than getting your d*ck sucked. At least for me… I love feeling teeth sink into me, a mouth clamping down and keeping me in place… the sigh of pleasure when my warm blood satisfies… then pulled out leaving my blood to drip down my neck like it’s all I’m good for.”

In between his exhales is a sexy moan that escapes his throat. It’s making me unable to look away, it’s making my hunger boil inside me. My fingers twitch as my brain is flashing images of me feeding on Leo, yearning for more blood.

“I like being fed on more than feeding,” Glass admits, eyes more dazed and his breathing changed. I don’t know what he drank, but I can feel it changing the way his blood smells. Still sweet, but… different. I don’t know what it is. Then, his head fell back. “Ahhh—”

“Glass, are you okay?!” I lift myself off the water, only to fall in pain from a sharp pain in my stomach, eyes flashing red.

Both Salve and Glass calls out, “Jude?”

“Ahh…” F*ck. I can barely breathe. I held my stomach and my vision lost all color except the color red, faintly running under Glass’ grey skin. The smell of his blood is calling out to me like a siren in the mist.

“Jude… you’re starving,” Glass observes me as I writhe in my own body. “Poor puppy, you need to feed. Come—”

“No!” I refuse, grunting in pain as I can barely move. “I’m not hungry! I’m just… a newborn—AHH!”

“Jude…” Salve knelt in front of me, on the verge of tears because he can feel my pain. He can feel my thirst, but he sobs as he can’t do anything to stop it.

“S-Sal…” I held his head, but it wasn’t Salve I was holding. It was Glass, looking at me with pity while I desperately held him for support.

“Poor thing,” he softly says. My thirst boiled in my throat, dry and desperate for warm, thick blood. His eyes, half-lidded with an inviting smile, “Please, Jude. You need to feed. Come… take me. Let me feel your teeth…”

“N-no… I…” all I could see in his face is Salve, back when we spent our first night together. He would call out my name like a prayer, begging me to take his virginity no matter how dirty and sinful it makes us. All I can think of is Salve, and how he begged just like that.

“Let me feel you…” he once said, both of us being teenagers who want nothing but each other. “Let me feed you with my body…”

Salve’s voice is different—softer, seductive. But he still begged for me, and who am I to say no to the love of my life. I crawl over him to feel the warmth of his body under me. He held me as if welcoming my hunger. Legs wrap around me and I yearned for his lips after only hearing him talk to me all these years.

Finally, I can kiss him. His familiar lips, the contrast of his skin on mine—God, it’s sexy. He makes me hard as the rock I’m kneeling on. I’ll worship this boy every day of my life. I miss pressing against his body and making him moan out loud to expose our sin to the world.

“Inside,” he moans, putting one of his legs on my shoulder while he looks at me with half-lidded, needy eyes that pull me into the depths. While drowning in his brown eyes, his hands help me undo my pants. “Inside… please, Jude!”

I was caught. Drowning in the depths of grey waters, dragged into the dark. I tried to go in, but it was tight. No lube, so I pulled away—

“No… ! Please!” His legs tightened, soft voice whimpering when I threatened to leave. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, the love in my heart overriding my thirst.

“I… don’t want to hurt you,” I breathe out, “I could never hurt you. I would never…”

“Make me bleed…” he takes my head, cradling it with his slender hands that I beg to embrace me more. “… sink into me and take my blood.”

Tears fell from my eyes, pushing myself into him only through the mercy of water and the softness of his entrance. I sob against his chest, “Salve…”

“Ohhh! Jude!” His voice isn’t soft anymore, yelling out my name like singing a gospel. “Yes! You’re inside… oh God, it feels so good!”

It wasn’t warm inside, unlike my first time with Salve. I thrusted harder to search for that warmth. Maybe I’ll find it deeper, maybe if I go harder.

“God, yes!” He arched his back, his eyes rolling back and beautiful lips smiling as if welcoming the pain. He didn’t bleed… he’s too soft to bleed, and I was relieved at that. He’s tight enough to keep me inside, but not to the point where I feel like I’m violating something sacred.

I don’t want to hurt him. I straightened my back, looking down at him as I drilled his hole while pressing my hand against his stomach.

“Jude!” He moans out, touching himself while watching me lose control inside of him. All I see is my precious Salve getting lost in the pleasure…

“Jude…” he’s crying, reaching out for me, but unable to touch.

“I’m gonna c*m…” He gasps out, the voice different. The face no longer in tears, but happily moaning out his pleasure. His smile encourages me to hold his leg harder, go deeper. Give him everything he asks for, as I have given him my heart long ago. And now, I’m about to give him my climax, thrusting deep inside of him.

“F*ck, I love this! Jude… you make me feel so good, puppy… keep going, ahhnn! I’m gonna c*m… you’re gonna taste warmth with my blood,” Seeing him smile with a soft, airy laugh made me realize… I wasn’t making love to Salve. I didn’t want blood from Salve.

I was f*cking Glass. I stopped, more tears suddenly falling upon realization. My mouth remained open in shock, looking up to see Salve—in his true, unchanging form, standing in front of me while I’m still inside Glass. Heartbreak was all over his face.

I fell forward, my hands on the ground as if begging for his forgiveness. I was already kneeling, looking up at him like a sinner who doesn’t deserve to be forgiven. I started crying, shaking my head in denial for what I’ve done. For the sinner I am, for the monster I was.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry, I… I… I’m…” I sob, “It hurts… everything… hurts…”

But Salve knelt by Glass’ head and held my cheek, giving me a sad smile. “If I could still bleed, I’d give you my blood. But I can’t… I couldn’t save you from the fall. I couldn’t save you from turning. All I can do is…“

Salve kneels forward to kiss me, and though I couldn’t feel it; just the sight of him right in front of me made my hips move, and he’s allowing it. He presses his forehead against mine as if telling me, “It’s gonna be okay. You’re gonna be okay.”

Glass reaches out to take one of my hands, putting it around his neck with a smile. That’s when my eyes flashed red—I can see inside his neck, dark red blood with the scent of sickly sweet fruit. Juicy and ripe for the taking, and he wants me to feed on him.

“I can’t…” I whisper to Salve.

“It’s okay. I’m here. Pretend it’s me,” Salve says. “You love me, don’t you? Show me how you love me…”

“C*m inside me, puppy…” that sweet request from Glass got me squeezing his neck before sinking my teeth into him, hearing him gasp out of pleasure. I can feel his hand rapidly pumping his c*m out, squirting in between our stomachs.

There it is. My eyes flashed a brighter red, my mouth sucking harder because this honey-velvet syrup is far tastier than the pure exquisite wine of Leo’s blood. Maybe it’s because I’m releasing my seed inside while taking something from him made the thick blood flow beautifully between my teeth, coating them on the way to my waiting throat. It was as sweet as the first bite of velvet cake, and the thickness of honey untouched by humans.

He gasps under me, his hand holding my head against his neck as if urging me to take more. I did; feeding on him like my life depended on it.

And when it filled my stomach to satisfaction, it was its own climax. I pulled away from him, my amateur bite causing a tear on his neck when I sat up. But that was exactly what he wanted, laughing loudly as he puts his hand over the wound and felt his bleeding neck. He licked his own blood from his fingers.

I couldn’t take my eyes away from Glass, kneeling with blood falling down my chin. The hunger and pain is gone. Only to be replaced by guilt and the overwhelming feeling of doom.

⭐️ VOTE | 💬 COMMENT | Is Jude our first switch MC 🤔

We complained to Ashley about how we got confused between Salve and Glass during the sm*t and she only answered, “Yeah that’s the point. Welcome to Jude’s mind.”