Chapter 14

Sinners voted Lucien, sinners get Lucien! 🤨🤨

Tell me, what’s the truth?
I’ve never been in love before you
You better make a move
Don’t test me now
So say that I’m worthy,
’cause I don’t expect it if I’m yours
The silence is hurting,
and I sure don’t care for it anymore
—Worthy, the Home Team

JUDE CRESTON

I woke up in Leo’s room the next morning. I did sleep over after I drank a little of his blood… he already felt euphoric by us making out, and his pleasure filled me up nicely. I’m not so greedy as to demand more.

“Reaaaally?” Salve looks at me suspiciously, sitting on Leo’s desk. “You forgot to say you wanted your hole drilled again, but he’s the one that said no.”

“I didn’t say it like that, Salve, I said if he wants to… maybe… under heavy consideration.”

Salve rolled his eyes, “Heavily considering riding that d*ck again.”

“Don’t be vulgar, we’re in a convent.”

“It’s the virgin-effect, y’know. You’ll get addicted after doing something for the first time. Remember after our first time, we did it three times a day for a week? I lost 10 pounds douching.”

“I’m not addicted to s*x,” I deny, fixing my clothes and realizing I’m still wearing Leo’s.

“Thou shalt not lie, you lying motherf*cker,” Salve mutters as I exit the room. I was heading to the kitchen where I think Leo is working on breakfast, but I heard voices I did not want to hear this morning.

“Pryce is all up in my *ss about that essay—and not in the way that I like!” Sh*t, it’s Evie! Probably with Glass, too. “It’s like we’re actually high schoolers and not century old vampires… what the f*ck is a word count?!”

“Quick, hide!” Salve says from an open window, so I darted towards him and hopped over, making sure to run towards the bushes to ensure they won’t smell me. Salve snorts, “Can flowers even hide your scent? You kinda stink.”

“Ghosts can’t smell!” I say with gritted teeth.

“Oh? What game are we playing?” A voice suddenly said from behind me, and both Salve and I turned around to see the blonde, blue eyed Lucien looking at me with the sun shining a light behind his head, making him look like a saint.

“I—I uhhh…” I’m not supposed to be talking to him, I’ll get in trouble.

But he beamed at me with the sweetest of smiles, “You came to see me! I’ve been wondering where you were… I made a flower crown for you, but… it kind of withered. Here! Have a special treasure instead. I found it near the lake…”

He hurried to hand me a smooth, brown-orange tinted rock. Salve even looked at it carefully saying, “It’s… a rock.”

“Wow…” I smile at Lucien, “This is beautiful. I thought only the ocean could make this.”

“It’s a f*cking rock—” I silenced Salve, while Lucien laughs like the wind blowing through trees. I feel guilty not visiting him, and I’ll feel horrible if I leave.

But I can’t even do that. I still hear Evie inside, suddenly saying my name and asking Glass where I am.

“Uhh… I’m kind of playing hide and seek with Evie,” I tell Lucien, “So I can’t stay…”

“Oh! You should’ve said so, silly. I have a perfect hiding place…” the blonde boy reached to hold my hand, making me widen my eyes in shock when he stated pulling me to the garden.

“Jude! What are you doing, don’t go with him!”

I look back at Salve, unable to pull my hand away from this boy’s hold. “H-hey Lucy, I don’t think I should—”

“Shhh! They’ll hear you…” Lucien giggles as we ran around the lake and towards the giant willow tree. Behind it, which no one would ever see from the convent, the tree is actually hollow.

I gasp, being pulled inside an opening only 4 feet tall. Inside, Lucien seems to like it with leaves and blankets. Lucien went towards a small box attached to a wire and put on batteries, until several fairy lights carelessly strung on the wooden walls lit up the place.

“Sorry it’s small… I never thought I’d bring someone here,” Lucien sat against the wall, and I can’t believe I’m actually excited to sit with him. Only that it was so tight our legs had to stick together.

“Wow… this tree was hollow all this time?”

“Yeah. I cleaned it up… I guess God made it so it’ll stay alive.” Lucien giggles, before moving towards me so he can avoid kicking me. “You’ll win the game, I’m sure. Although… it’s too early for a hide and seek game. I guess this is just a trial for you.”

“What do you mean?”

“They play it during Halloween,” Lucien answered, “I wanted to join them. I even hid… but they wouldn’t look for me.”

He looks down sadly, and it broke my heart seeing eyes full of life get clouded by loneliness. I yearn to hold his hand, but it’s too smooth and without callouses, unlike my own. I’m too dirty of a sinner to touch such an innocent boy. I’m afraid I might taint him…

“I’m sorry, Lucien. I’d love to play with you… but they don’t want me near you. Pryce was very strict about not even talking to you.”

“Awww…” those eyes glistened, and my heart is tugged with guilt. “I’m… I’m thankful anyway. You’re here… I feel like I finally have a friend, even for a short while.”

“Jude,” Salve whispers from outside the hollow tree, “Maybe they’re just bullsh*tting you. What if they want you to stay away because they think you’d be like Evie and want to f*ck him.”

I don’t see Lucien that way. Also, why are you whispering?

“The kid is weird, what if he hears me? Anyway—that’s what ruining his innocence means, right?” I’m still not sure. What if I do? What if even touching him as a friend d*mns him to hell? Salve tells me, “These vampires are already heartless leaving him alone. You’re not like them, are you?”

No. I may be a cold vampire, but I’m not heartless.

“You know… maybe I’ll stay. They don’t have to know… I think you’re worth getting in trouble for.”

His eyes went wide and quite literally sparkled, reflecting the lights around us, “Really?!”

“Nobody deserves to be alone…” Swallowing my hesitance, I touched Lucien’s hand and—

“Lucy,” says a female nun, which I couldn’t see because I’m facing away from her. My hands are small… like a toddler’s, and they’re holding a dirty ball. “You shouldn’t be out here all alone. Why are you talking to yourself anyway?”

“I’m not alone. I’m talking to my mother… she’s over here!” I pointed towards a tree, but there was no one.

The sister sighed. “Poor child… I know you must miss your mother. But sometimes they go away and… you think you just see them when they’re never there. You should pray to God instead of speaking to ghosts, child.”

“But my mom is here—”

“Lucien,” she firmly says, “A high ranking priest will be here to pick you up tomorrow. He will take care of you.”

“Is mother coming with—”

“I’m sorry child, but someday you have to let her go.” She strictly says, “Get inside for the 3pm prayer. Afterwards, you shall pack your bags.”

During the 3pm prayer, I felt an older kid poking my shoulder. “Hey blondie.”

I tried to ignore him, reciting Our Father in my head until I felt the same hand pull my hair to the back. I cried out and he sneered, “I’m talking to you! Is it true you’re getting adopted tomorrow? Hah, are you gonna burn their house too?”

“I-I didn’t—”

“They’ll return you again. Just like the others did…”

“Please stop—let go of my hair!” I yell, but all I did is make the nun get mad and march towards us.

“Lucien, Daryl!” The nun yells at us, with everyone now staring.

The boy hissed to my ear, “You’re a curse, Lucien. Everyone who puts you in their house ends up ruined—”

“MOMMA, HELP!” I screamed so loud, all the stained glass windows in our church shattered and fell into everyone, they had to duck and take cover. But the nun and the boy holding me weren’t so lucky…

Glass pierced through the boy’s head like a deliberate attack, and a shard also flew onto the nun’s throat. Their skin starts to turn red from all the tiny pieces sticking to it. All the other kids screamed in terror, some injured with pieces but none as bloody as the nun and Daryl.

Maybe he was right. Maybe I am a curse…

The next day, the church was temporarily closed down because of the accident. I didn’t know why it happened… and I hope Daryl and the nun are okay. But I never saw them today.

“This is him?” I was approached by a man in priestly robes but I didn’t see his face, I didn’t look up.

The nun accompanying him, seemed to sound scared when speaking about me. “Sir… this child, I… I’ve told you about the previous incidents, I advice against—”

“All children deserve a home, Sister Grace. Lucien just needs to find the right one. He needs the right guidance, to ensure he stays on a path paved by God.” He turns to her, “I’d like a moment alone with the child.”

I hear her heels moving away and out of the door, and I held my gaze to the floor, scared that another accident might happen and he may get hurt because of me.

“You must be Lucien.” He knelt down, but I remained staring at the floor, shy and scared. “I am Monsignor Sinclair, head of Our Lady of Carnation Valley. I am here to take you to your new home.”

I remained quiet. How strange that I’m being adopted by a priest, instead of the other kids who’ve had parents to take them? I’m scared.

“Do you want to hear a secret, boy?” He said, which piqued my interest. “You are a special boy, Lucien. You do not belong to ordinary parents. Humans, they… they break, they sin. You are not a sinner, are you child?”

I didn’t even know what that word means. But I saw my mother looking at me outside the window—a woman whose face I can’t see because of the glass. But her presence made me happy, and I waved hello to her.

The man wondered, “Who are you looking at, Lucien?”

“My mother. Maybe she’ll come with me.”

The Monsignor smiled, and for the first time I wasn’t told I should let her go. Instead he tells me, “I hope she does.”

“I hope—” I whispered, but this time I’m staring at my hand on Lucien’s, and I’m no longer in the adoption center. I’m in the tree, with a boy looking at me with hopeful eyes. Nobody deserves to be alone. “I hope… I hope I get to stay with you.”

But I was slightly trembling. Lucien caused multiple accidents… from house fires to the church’s windows killing a child and a nun. And yet, he believes they didn’t die. He knows nothing of death, only hurt.

The Monsignor adopted Lucien… because of what? Because he could do that all while being human? I want to ask him… I want to know more. But Pryce’s voice echoed in my head, “Don’t tell him anything.”

Anything I say may ruin his innocence.

“I won’t tell anyone you’re with me,” Lucien smiles, “You’ll win the game I’m sure, Evie doesn’t like walking through grass because it’s wet.”

“How… do you know that?” I can’t stop looking at him. It’s like he’s the singular light in a dark hellish place and I’m not talking about this tree.

Lucien shrugs, “I’ve watched and listened to them for years. I always see Glass picking up mushrooms and eating them. I tried to warn him they’re poisonous… but he just smiles at me and does it again. I think he just likes mushrooms.”

I’ve seen Glass with a couple of substances before… Salve whispers from the entrance, “Maybe that’s how he can stand his stupid f*cking boyfriend. Ask him about Leo.”

Why are you still whispering? If Lucien can hear you then he’d still hear your whispers.

“What about Leo? What do you know about him… other than his delicious food, of course.”

“He likes you…” Lucien excitedly scrunches his nose at me, “He’s usually very cold and mean towards the others… but he’s nicer now. I’ve wondered why, until I saw his smile when he looks at you. It’s different… like he has never been cold.”

“Leo? I can’t believe he’d be cold and mean.”

“Redd was the opposite before you came in…” Lucien said, “He smiled a lot, he even got in trouble trying to be friends with me. He stays away, now… but I keep my eyes on him. When you came here… he suddenly stops smiling all the time. I hear him and Glass fight over the walls. I hear your name sometimes.”

Redd… he probably hates me. Gosh, does he think I’m here to steal Glass away? I mean, I liked Glass but I’m not here to steal anyone away. He can have him—

“Liar,” Salve barked. I had to stop thinking.

“Pryce is the one I don’t hear from at all… I barely even see him through the windows,” says Lucien. That makes sense, he’s the most strict on staying away from Lucien. “But he’s handsome, isn’t he?”

I nod, unable to deny. “He looks like a Class President.”

“What’s that?”

“Oh uhm… it’s hard to explain. Instead, I’m gonna say he looks like a Prince Charming. His hair looks so soft and bouncy… then when he smiles, it’s like he has never been sad in his whole life. Kind of like you.”

Lucien laughs, “I get sad all the time!”

“But your smile looks like the definition of happiness,” I tell him, and he giggles, snuggling into my shoulder because he’s shy. I won’t deny that I’ll do anything to keep that smile on him. Lucien tends to be unaware of personal space, but I know it’s not everyday he gets to talk to someone.

“You know a lot about them than I do, Lucy. What about me? Uhm… I wonder what you’ve heard about me.”

“I heard my father say you’re really special,” he said, which shocked me. Those words are the exact same ones he said to young Lucien. “That’s why he chose you.”

“He… chose me?” My stomach dipped. “But… I applied here, I thought the convent accepts everyone.”

“Not really. Students come and go. They don’t stay for long, and I’m glad Redd chose to stay… I hope you stay, too,” he mumbles against my shoulder, and my heart fluttered like the first time Salve ever laid his head on my body.

Even though we have a choice, I feel like I can’t leave. I refuse to prey on God’s creations.

But I couldn’t stay with Lucien for long. I had to go to church, one that I am very late for. I ran inside, interrupting Pryce at the altar. Everyone looked at me while I stood beside Leo—Evie giving me dirty looks wasn’t new, but Glass and Redd just looked at me.

“Where have you been?” Leo whispers as Pryce instructed all of us to sit.

“I got lost, sorry. I’ve never been to the third floor before… God, I feel like a heretic.”

“It’s your first time in church and you made this impression?” He whispers with a scoff. I looked down, embarrassed, until he adds, “But don’t worry… mass is for those who want to feel like they’re closer to God because they’re too far from Her in thoughts and the heart.”

“That’s an odd belief,” I comment. “What makes you say that, Leo?”

“The devoted children of God know that She’s within their hearts, and mass is just a way to appreciate Her. Those who sinned heavily, everyday, trying to compensate… that’s who go to church and project by damning other people to Hell.”

“But God forgives, doesn’t She?” I whisper to him, “She doesn’t throw people to Hell.”

I could barely hear Pryce as Leo answers, “She doesn’t. People end up in Hell themselves. God forgives, but She also punishes. Look at Lucifer… he is proof of God’s mercy and justice.”

However, I felt farther from God the more I think about the boy I was with earlier. Not because of any damning thoughts of him, but because I looked into his memories and saw the suffering of a little boy who is brought to the convent full of vampires. He shouldn’t be here.

“What do you know about Lucien?” I whisper to Leo.

“I don’t know anything about Lucien.” Leo looks around, “They might hear you, Jude. Don’t talk about him.”

“Then take me into your head.”

“Are you crazy—?!” Both Salve and Leo raised their voice, but only Leo made Pryce stop. “Ahh… forgive me.”

Evie scowled at me, while Glass’ eyes are just soft as usual. Pryce continued, while I intertwined my hands together with Leo. He looked at our hands in concern.

“The devil won’t hurt me. Just take me into your head and we’ll talk there. I’ll be out before the next Hymn.”

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