Chapter 31

You never anticipate that it will happen to somebody you know. It’s a rare thing. I mean, you may hear about it happening to the nice lady down the street, or to a member of your high school’s faculty, but you never think that it would happen to someone who has been in your life since the day you were born.

Until it does.

“I have cancer.” My mother’s words stung. Words I never expected to hear. Words I never wanted to hear.

Silence enveloped the room.

My mind instantly raced with several worst-case scenarios as my eyes began welling with tears and my chest began tightening with the possibility of future grief. It was as if the entire world paused around me.

This is not fair. I thought to myself.

“How long have you known?” Asked Mitchell.

My mother cleared her throat and took a deep breath as she settled further into her seat. “For a few weeks, now.” She answers. “Almost a month.”

“Well-” I choked. I felt an ache in my heart. “Are there treatments you can do?” I managed to ask, fighting back tears.

“Yes, that’s why we decided to tell you tonight.” She paused to take a sip from her tea. “I start chemotherapy at the end of this week.”

“So… you’ll get better? You’ll be okay? Right?” My voice quavered.

“I hope so.” Mom gave an optimistic smile.

“She’ll get better.” Dad says from he seat, reassuringly.

A particular flashback came to mind.

I was seven or eight years old, dressed in a black suit and crying because my grandfather had died. The wake was held at our place, and I was upstairs in my bedroom holding my grandpa’s watch in my hand. He had gifted it to me two weeks before, which angered Mitchell. Grandma Kate spoiled Mitchell, while Grandpa spoiled me. I never understood why, it’s just how it always was. I had always wondered why he gifted it to me two weeks before his death. It was as if he knew… As I was crying on the edge of my bed, my mother comes in. She’s dressed in all black, except for the string of pearls around her neck. “There you are.” She says, taking a seat next to me. She puts a hand around me and pulls me closer. “It’s okay.” She says. “He’s in a better place.” I sniffle, clutching grandpa’s watch in my hand. “Mom?” I croaked. “Yes?” She’s still holding onto me, but she pulls away so that she can see my face, which was red from all of the crying. “Why do people die?” It’s the question everyone wonders, especially when we’re children. My mother takes a breath before answering my seven to eight year old self’s valid question. “It’s a part of life.” She says. “I know it sucks, but everyone dies eventually.”
“I don’t wanna die.” I say. My mother wipes away the tears from my cheeks. “You won’t. Not for a very, very long time. You’ll grow up, make friends, travel around the world, fall in love and maybe one day you will even start a little family of your own.” I sniffled. “I hope I die before you, dad and Mitchell.” I say. My mother gasped at that. “Why would you want that?” She wondered. “I don’t think I’ll be able to live without you guys.” My mother pulled me into her embrace. “Oh, my sweet little boy.”

I return to the present, and, with tears falling from my eyes, I get out of my seat and throw my arms around her. “Oh, sweetie.” He hugs me back. Mitchell joins the hug on the other side of mom. Then, dad comes over, adding the final puzzle to the embrace. We stayed like that for what seemed like forever, and I wish it had been forever.

It was now a few hours later, and we were all seated in the living room watching mom’s favourite movie: The Notebook. We made popcorn and hot chocolates, and dad wanted s’mores but mom insisted that it would be best to not accidentally burn the house down like the last time dad wanted s’mores.

It was perfect.

And I never wanted it to end.

After midnight, I woke up on the couch. Dad and Mitchell had fallen asleep on each recliner, whereas I had fallen asleep on the sofa.

Where’s mom? I wondered, finding the place where she was seated empty.

A noise coming from the kitchen answered my thought. Either she was in there, or a robber was stealing all of our junk food.

“What are you doing up?” Mom asked as I limped into the kitchen. She was seated on a stool at the countertop with her laptop and some papers.

What was she doing up? I thought.

“I woke up.” I tell her. “Why are you up?”

“I’m.. uh, I’m looking for things for us to do this week.” She says. “I was thinking we could go stay at our lake house for a few days, or maybe for the rest of the week?”

I halted in place, turning to face her with a perplexed look on my face. “Uh, since when did we have a lake house?” I asked.

Not once in my life have I heard that we owned a lake house.

“Oh, right, we hadn’t been there since you and Mitchell were little.” She slightly closes her laptop screen and pushes it to the side a bit. “It used to be grandpa’s lake house, until he passed away.”

“Grandpa gave you his lake house?” I wondered.

I’d bet uncle Rick wouldn’t have been happy about that.

“Actually, he gave it to you and Mitchell.”

“He did?”

“Yep.”

Why is this the first I’m hearing of it?

“The lake house is a few hours away, and it has a pool, it even has a hot tub.” She says. “I remember going there growing up, it’s the most beautiful place. A view of the lake and a pretty little pier. There used to be a boat, but your father and grandfather sunk it.” She laughed.

“It sounds perfect.” I smiled.

“Do you want to invite your friends to come? We can have a little party and do a bunch of fun things.”

I sighed. “I don’t think I’ll be hanging out with my friends anymore.”

“Why not?” She asked.

“I wanted to hang out with them today. They said they were busy, but then I saw all of them hanging out at Joe’s, without me.” I frowned.

“Oh, that must’ve sucked.”

“Yeah, it did.” I take a seat on a stool next to my mother and rest my face in my hands.

“Have you asked them why they left you out?”

“Why would that matter? They still deliberately left me out.” I say.

“Maybe they had a good reason?”

“Why are you defending them?” I asked, a hint of anger in my tone.

“I’m not, sweetie. It’s just… Friends are very important.”

“They were… But it feels like they don’t really care about me anymore.”

“Of course they do.” My mom puts a hand on my shoulder. “When you go to school tomorrow, just ask them and see if there has been a misunderstanding or something.”

“I’m not going to school tomorrow.” I tell her. “I hate school.”

“Well, I won’t force you to go to school, not if you don’t want to.” She opens up her laptop screen and continued doing whatever she was doing when I walked in.

“I want to stay home and spend as much time as I can with you before you have to go through chemo.” I tell her.

“You’ll be able to visit me in the hospital whenever you want.” She informed me.

“Why can’t you stay here? I heard you can.” I say. I wrote a school paper on chemotherapy last year, I can’t remember what class it was for, but i’m glad it came in handy.

“It’s different with cancer patients. Some can stay at home between chemo, some are advised to stay in hospital.”

Oh.

“Can we come over and visit you everyday?”

“I would love that.” She smiled.

I hop off of my stool and hug her. I could smell her signature scent of wild vanilla and caramel as I inhaled. I never want to let go…

“Goodnight, mom.” I say.

“Goodnight, my sweet little boy.”

I decided to go to school the next day. I would have preferred to stay home, but my mom was right. I needed to talk to my friends.

My sprained ankle was still being a nuisance, so I asked my dad to drive me to school. I would have gone with Mitchell, but I would rather not be near Grayson at the moment.

“Do you need some money for lunch?” Dad asked as we came to a halt in the parking lot.

“It’s okay, I packed some.” I lied.

“Alright. Your mom and I will see you when you get back home from school.”

“Okay. Bye dad.”

“Bye son.”

I exit the vehicle and crutch my way towards the school building, a soft breeze wafting across my face.

I shouldn’t be here.

I should be at home taking care of my mom. I should’ve made her favorite breakfast for her, and maybe tidied up the house.

Instead, I’m in the one place I didn’t want to be.

“Hi Dallas.” Deja greeted me from the sidewalk on the way into the school.

“Oh, hey.” I gave a slight smile.

“How are you?” She asked.

“Uh.. I’ve been better.” I answered honestly.

“If you ever want to talk, I’m here.” She puts a hand on my shoulder.

“Thanks.” I say.

“Okay, I have to go meet up with my friends but I’ll maybe talk to you later?” She’s walking backwards.

“Okay, maybe talk to you later.” I smile.

With a smile on her face, she spins around and darts into school. When I entered the building, I started straight towards the spot where my friends and I always hang out. When I turn the corner to go down the hall to where my friends were seated, I see that they’re in a discussion. They’re probably debating who the best Lord of the Rings character is… again. Jake is with them. Oh? He’s no longer suspended?

When I approach them further, they see me coming and end their conversation.

Why do I get the feeling that they were talking about me?

“Hey Dal!” Hannah is the first to greet me.

“Hi.” I respond, withdrawn.

Cody stands up and reaches down for his bag. “I have to go… see someone.” He says.

“No you don’t.” I said bluntly.

He looks at me and is surprised by the annoyance in my tone.

“So… where we’re you guys yesterday?” I asked, scanning their faces.

“I wasn’t feeling well.” Lucy says as the others stammered to come up with an excuse.

“I was at home.” Was the lie Hannah came up with.

“Yeah, and I was-” Before Phillip can finish his lie, I decide to cut him off.

“I know you guys were hanging at Joe’s Cafe.”

Each of their faces slightly fell, as if to say ohhh..

“Why didn’t you want me there?” I asked them. Well, to be more specific, I was asking Cody, who was standing slightly hunched over, fiddling with his fingers while his eyes were glued to his own shoes.

“Wait, you guys hung out at Joe’s yesterday?” Lucy asks.

Oh, I guess she was telling the truth.

“Yeah.” Phillip surrendered with defeat.

I shake my head with disbelief. They can’t even come up with a reason as to why they excluded me?

“Why didn’t you want to hang out with me?” I asked again, this time my voice came off despondently.

“Dal, it’s not like that… we just… we, uh…” Hannah turns to Jake, who just shrugs his shoulders.

“You guys are great friends. Truly, the best.” I say sarcastically.

“Since you clearly don’t want to hang out with me, why don’t we make it official. I quit this friend group.” With that said, I turn around and crutch my way to the parking lot. I was both upset and completely infuriated.

There’s no way on earth I’m staying at school.

“Where are you going?” Mitchell wondered as I neared the exit. He and Grayson must have just gotten here.

“I’m going home.” I told him, low-spiritedly.

“What’s going on?” He asked. “Did someone pick on you?”

“No. I just don’t want to be here anymore.” I don’t bother waiting for him to stop me as I crutch my way towards the door.