Chapter 7 – Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

When I returned from yoga the next morning, Luke was up and in the pool, practicing. I stood at the kitchen window and watched him swim down and back, down and back, his muscled back gliding across the water far more gracefully than I expected from a novice. I cut up a plate of fruit and took it and my coffee to the porch. I was absorbed in my iPad when Luke joined me, his board shorts and hair wet and a towel draped around his neck.

"Good morning, James," he said.

I almost didn't recognize him. He seemed far more comfortable and confident than the boy who had called me for help the day before.

"Good morning, Luke" I answered, smiling at him. "You looked great. You're a natural. You took to the water like a duck."

"I finally understand what the fuss is about," he answered. "Water always seemed silly to me. But, now, I feel, I don't know, weightless in it."

"I feel the same way. Weightless and, I don't know, at peace. Whenever it all feels to be too much, I try to swim the heaviness away."

"That's exactly what I felt like I was doing. Swimming the heaviness away. I feel like a different person."

I stood up and asked Luke to stand up. When he did, I wrapped my arms around him, and he wrapped his arms around me. As I had the day before, I moved my right hand to his head and held it against my chest.

"Just relax and soak it in," I said.

"Soak what in?"

"The affection. That's what a hug yields. Affection."

When Luke pressed his head to my chest, I squeezed him as hard as I could. He squeezed me back as hard as he could. Before I could not, I pulled out of the embrace and returned to my chair.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"Like I said last night, I think we both deserve to be touched a little more."

"You can say that again. I think I've been cheated my whole life. I ain't hardly ever been touched."

"If you want to talk like me, you can start by eliminating 'ain't.' Ain't ain't a word."

"I know, but that's a hard one. I've been talking like that my whole life."

"Hard isn't impossible, and you should try to do impossible things, in any event. It builds character."

"I'm a solider. I've got people building my character every day."

"I have people building my character every day," I corrected.

"I have people building my character every day," he repeated.

After lunch, we went to a matinee showing of Mad Max: Fury Road. As we drove, I strongly suggested he not eliminate the end Gs in words when he spoke. We practiced everythinG and nothinG and somethinG.

About halfway through the movie, Luke whispered "here" and held his hand out, palm up and open. I was shocked, but not so shocked that I didn't take it in mine. He then slid them between the seats where anyone not minding their own business would not see that the two men in the middle of the middle row were holding hands. Every once in a while, Luke squeezed my hand with his. Each time, I squeezed back. And smiled inside.

After the movie, we got monstrous frozen custards and headed home. Luke was like a child, his cheeks and chin covered with his cookies and cream concrete. Obsessive, I was the opposite, eating while driving and not getting even the hint of a drop anywhere other than my tongue.

When I awoke from my nap, Luke was again in the pool, alternating between his freestyle stroke and floating on his back. I liked it best when he floated, his creamy white chest and mounded board shorts sticking up out of the water.

I stood up to join him. "Luke," I called. "Come out for a second. You need sunscreen on your back."

"And my front," he said, climbing out. "I didn't put any on."

"New rule. You can't go in the pool without sunscreen."

"You, too?"

"Fine. Me, too."

I watched Luke apply sunscreen as I applied my own. When it was time, he turned to me, accepting that I was going to cover his back and sides. I loved the feel of him and the contrast between my large, tan hand and his creamy white skin. Unlike the last time, he was not taut this time.

When I was finished, Luke covered my back. His hands on my skin was too much for me, and I got a little lost in it. I shocked myself when I moaned. He paused when I did, but then continued on.

When he was finished, I again dove into the pool to hide what he did to me. He followed me in with more of a flop than a dive. I climbed aboard a raft and settled back. I must have dozed off. When I woke up, Luke was on a raft next to me, facing the opposite direction and holding my right hand in his.

"Hey, Sleepy," he said, when he noticed I was awake.

"Hey, Guppy," I responded.

"Guppy?"

"Yep. You're a new swimmer. You're like a guppy."

"This is nice, isn't it?"

"It's more than nice," I answered, squeezing his hand.

Over dinner, I asked about being a soldier. He walked me through what seemed to be a mundane and routinized existence.

"And you like it?" I asked.

"I do. I ain't never . . . I haven't ever really fit in anywhere. I fit in there. No one cares about anything other than whether you're either a good soldier. The guys either feel like you've got their back or they don't."

"And you're good?"

"I'm better than good. I'm the best. I just get it. There are lots of things I don't get, but I get being a soldier."

"Like you get swimming?"

"Oh, way more than swimming. I get being a soldier the way some people get math. It's just easy for me. I felt it when I first cleaned my rifle or shined my shoes. It's what I'm meant to do."

After dinner, Luke and I shared a bottle of wine on the porch. We sat at opposite ends of the sofa, our legs intermingled as we each leaned on one arm and talked. Luke asked me about Jess, and I told him as many stories as I could bear. Most had been locked away since before Jess died. As I talked, I absent mindedly traced a trail with my right forfinger from mole to mole to mole on his left calf.

"You have a lot of moles," I observed.

"I have a lot of beauty marks," he corrected.

"Is that what they are?"

"Yes. Every single one of them."

"I'm not surprised," I said, taking a risk and then winking at him. As always, he winked back.

I awoke on the sofa at just past 2 a.m. Luke was dead to the world, so I extricated myself, pulled him flat, and covered him with my favorite throw before going in to bed. He was still there the following morning when I left for yoga, the corners of his mouth turned up. He appeared to be smiling as he slept.