Chapter 9

A frog in (one’s) throat
Difficulty speaking because of an overwhelming emotion.

• o 🦋 o •

Spring was in full swing and I was excited. I’d just reached Mica’s house and we were going to hang out. Just for fun. No Riley business, no cake tasting, just two friends hanging out.

We’d decided to hang at Mica’s place because my mom was redecorating our house and the clutter was intense.

To my surprise the gates were already open and Mica was laying on his stomach in the grass. He was reading a book on an old quilt. Today’s outfit consisted of a breezy white knit sweater with some light green shorts and white socks to match. I didn’t know why I always paid attention to what Mica was wearing. I never noticed on other people but yeah.. Mica was special.

And.. What I thought was special was that Mica had decided to wear green exactly when we’re supposed to hang out. He knew green was my favorite color! This was a sign!

Oh! Who was I kidding? A sign for what?!

“Mica!” I said a little too excitedly.

Mica looked up from his book and smiled. “James!”

It was almost like he was surprised I was there. Did he really think I would just bail on him?

He got up and approached me.

“You’re here.” He said, seeming very pleased.

“So I am.” I answered awkwardly.

Mica grabbed my wrist. “Come, I bought all kinds of snacks.” He led me inside the house which I enjoyed a little too much.

Once inside I saw all the different snacks on the table.

An assortment of sliced fruits: watermelon, mango, apple and then there were the packaged snacks, all kinds of chips, nuts, candy, chocolate…

“We’re just two people!” I laughed.

“Well, I didn’t know which ones you liked.”

“You could’ve called or texted.”

“Yeah, I guess. Sorry.” Mica chuckled.

He seemed more nervous than usual.

“No need to apologize. I can’t wait to devour as much as I can.”

“Great! Don’t be shy, grab as much as you want.”

I nodded happily and reached for the nachos. Nom.

“How are you, by the way? I totally forgot to ask.” Mica asked.

“You know.. Good. Nothing special.” I answered. I was more than good now that we were together but I wasn’t gonna say that.

“And you? How are things at home?” Ever since the recital I’d been nervous about Mica spending time at home with his dad.

“Same as you. Just normal.” Mica answered, heading over to the couch.

“So what do you wanna watch?” Mica changed the subject.

I sat next to him. Mica gave me the remote. I scrolled through the movie app. Horrors and thrillers were a no-go of course which pretty much left dramas and romantic movies.. I didn’t really want to watch a heavy movie. A rom-com seemed like a good enough idea.

There was one called Simple Love. It was K-movie and it looked really cute and fluffy.

“How about this one?” I asked.

“Sure.” Mica agreed easily.

I pressed play and we began watching. In the beginning it was quite awkward. Neither of us said anything.

I munched on some chips. It only then occurred to me that Mica didn’t have any snack at all.

“Do you want some?” I asked.

Mica thought about it for a while. “Uh.. sure.” He agreed. He scooted closer to me.

Oh lawd. Butterflies.

I could feed it to him. I’m sure he’d just smile and be cool with it.

But of course, me being the the awkward toad I was, I just gave him the bag.

“Thanks.” Mica munched on like two chips before giving it back.

“Do you not like snacks or something?” I asked.

Mica looked away from the screen. “I already had a bunch laying it all out for you.” He chuckled.

“Ah, I see.”

We both turned back to the screen. The couple in the movie were about to have their first kiss.

Mica yawned.

Did he not like this movie? Or maybe he was just tired. I was sure dancing all day must be exhausting.

I accidentally yawned too even though I wasn’t tired at all.

I peeked at Mica again. He was watching the movie but he didn’t seem to be all there. I wondered what was on his mind.

What was on my mind was that I really, ridiculously bad wanted to wrap my arm around him and pull him closer. I wanted him to fall asleep in my arms and then I wanted to kiss him. Bad.

Mica suddenly looked at me. I began to blush.

“Do you not like the movie?” Mica asked kindly.

“I do. I just..” I used this moment to put my arm on the couch behind him. That shouldn’t be so bad, right?

Mica barely noticed.

“I got distracted.”

I GOT DISTRACTED? WHY NOT JUST SAY ‘I LOVE YOU’! IDIOT.

“Is something on your mind?”

You. You! You! A thousand times, you!

“Well..” Think! Think!!

“How do you feel about that?” I nodded at the TV.

“Rom-coms?” Mica asked.

“Love. Have you ever been in love?”

My courage was impressive.

Mica chuckled. “No. Not yet. I always wonder what it feels like, though.”

Guess that meant he truly had zero feelings for me. Ouch.

“Have you?” Mica asked, leaning towards me.

“Well..” I looked down at the couch.

“You have? Tell me!” Mica said excitedly.

“It- I-”

“Come on, please! I promise I won’t tell anyone!”

“It.. you don’t- it’s not..” Damn, I was flustered.

“Does Riley know?”

“No!” I said, getting even hotter.

“Are you still in love with her?”

“Riley?!”

“No, I mean whoever you’re talking about.”

Her. Ha. I wish it were a her. I wish it were anyone but him! He’s not in my league!

“Alright. Don’t tell me.” Mica turned back to the TV. His shoulder grazed against my arm.

“Are you pouting?” I said in disbelief. I’d never seen him like this.

“No.” Mica pouted.

“Aw!” I shook Mica playfully and he eventually smiled again. I let my hand rest on his shoulder and he seemed okay with it.

He was sitting there so calmly while I was nervous and sweating all of a sudden. I had Mica under my arm.

I decided to just watch the TV and focus on the movie.

“What kind of girls do you like anyway?” Mica asked. 

“You’re not gonna get me to say it if that’s your plan.” 

“I probably won’t know her anyway. Just tell me your type.” 

You. 

“Well.. I like nice people, I guess. People that go out of their way to be the best person they can be.. I guess that’s the main thing.” It was honestly painfully obvious I was talking about him. 

“She sounds like a saint.” 

“She is.” 

Mica looked wistful. I couldn’t exactly figure out why that was..

“Is something wrong?” I asked. 

“Hm? No. I was just thinking.. Just wondering if I’d ever find someone. Probably not. Not until I’m thirty, my dad says.” Mica chuckles. “But he has nothing to worry about. Even then I probably won’t…” 

“What do you mean? What’s not to like about you?” 

“I’m not perfect. Far from it.” 

“You don’t have to be. Mica, you’re a gem, alright?” 

Mica chuckled. 

“I would- If..” 

How do you say I would totally date you without freaking someone out?

“If I was a girl I’d date you in a heartbeat.” 

…

Alright so I’ve decided I’m getting my tongue removed. Help.

Mica began to laugh. “I can’t quite imagine you as a girl.” 

I was happy he took it so well. 

“Don’t you think I’d make a pretty girl? I’m starting to get offended here.” 

Mica couldn’t stop laughing. 

“You know, just imagine me with like, hair to my back and red nail polish. I’d totally wear those lace up boots, you know? And like.. a glitter dress.” 

Mica was laughing his ass off by this point. And I could see why. Imagining myself as a girl was kind of reminding me of that Spongebob movie with Patrick in high heels. I began to laugh myself. 

“You know what? You’ve convinced me, I’d date you too if you were a girl.” Mica smiled.

Why couldn’t we just date now?!

We resumed watching the movie and all I could think about was him saying he’d date me. Obviously it was a joke but.. was it? 

The girl in the movie bit her lip before kissing the guy suddenly. I was shocked! How would he respond? This could ruin their friendship forever! But.. the guy smiled and kissed her back and they basically lived happily ever after.

Could it really be that easy?

It was only a while later that Mica’s head fell onto my shoulder. I looked to my side and found Mica fast asleep.

His hair tickled my neck.

Now my heart was really beating like a drum.

I involuntarily stroked Mica’s soft hair. I smelled it too.

“M-Mica?” I asked to see how deep asleep he was. There was no response.

I took a chance and took his hand. I wished he liked me as much as I did him. But maybe.. like the girl, I had to take a chance.

Mica stretched and opened his eyes. I quickly let go of his hand. 

He leaned up, putting his hand on my leg.

“I fell asleep?”

“Yeah.”

And you were really cute I wanted to add.

“I’m so sorry. I really like the movie, I’m just-”

“Hey, no worries. I understand.” I brushed some hair behind Mica’s ear.

Mica didn’t act weird or pull away. He just stared into my eyes as I did in his. That had to count for something, right?

If I could I would kiss him right now.

Physically I could. He was in such close proximity..

I leaned forward just to see what he would do.. Nothing. He just sat there staring into my soul. I could always ask if I could..

Who the heck was I kidding? 

The door burst open and Mica’s dad came into the living room. I practically flew to the other side of the couch.

“Dad!” Mica said surprised. He looked at the clock above the TV.

“I decided to skip the dinner after all.” George explained. Then he eyed me. “You didn’t tell me you were bringing someone over.”

“I know. I forgot. I’m sorry.” I could see Mica tense up. I felt awful.

“It- it was my fault. I came over spontaneously. Mica didn’t know and when he tried to text you I distracted him.” I was kind of proud of my lying skills. I usually sucked.

George nodded but he did not look convinced.

Never mind. I still sucked.

I got up. “I should go.”

“Yes. It’s getting late.” George said.

It was barely eight!

“You’re right. I’m sorry again, sir.” I bowed to him and hurried over to the door. “Um, I’ll see you later, Mica.”

“Goodnight, James.” Mica looked so uncomfortable. So terribly tense.

I wanted to ask to stay but it was pretty apparent that George didn’t want me here.

I waited outside and watched through the window. I could hear them pretty well.

“What was that boy really doing here?” George’s tone was authoritative.

“We were just watching movies.”

“Wasting time. What about your practice?”

“I did practice before, I just wanted to take a break!”

“You can take a break when you’ve reached the top and earned a proper living for yourself. You are not to waste your time before that, you hear me?!” I finally heard him raise his voice. A sound that made me shiver.

“Yes dad. I’m sorry.”

“Go to the studio, I’ll be right there.”

“Dad, I’m tired. Can I please do that tomorrow?”

Silence. 

Worried, I peeked inside. George was just looking at him but his eyes were so harsh. Hateful, almost. It gave me chills. His eyes were big and scornful.

Mica reclined without another word.

I balled my hands into fists and nearly began banging on the door and window! How could Mica’s dad think it was okay to talk to his son like that! Furthermore, to wear him out like this! Didn’t he understand people needed breaks?

I peered into the room and saw George turn towards the window. I quickly sank down to the ground and waited for him to leave. The lights in the garden were on. If he looked closely he could see me. Shit! Holy freaking shit! I looked up and saw George closing the curtains. I sighed of relief and sprinted to my bike.